Mad Mixed Woman

I hate having to answer questions about my racial makeup because invariably some dumb shit is going to follow. I guess that’s to be expected, though, since anyone who would ask you about your racial background within five minutes of knowing you is not exactly going to be all that racially sensitive.

A lady asked me this today, saying that I am clearly a “mix” of something. I explained and she said, “Oh, you’re biracial!” I wasn’t aware that only black and white mixes are biracial, but okay. And then she told me how you never know how mixes will “turn out,” as if mono racial people all look the same or something. She also said that she wasn’t sure if I was Asian or something else and then her coworker told me to not “feel bad” about being potentially mistaken for Asian, as if this is something that would actually make me feel bad. I was pretty disgusted.

The scary thing is that this lady has a mixed race daughter. How can she possibly help her daughter navigate a racist, white supremacist world that often fetishizes mixed race people (particularly women) when she is so cluelessly offensive? How can you have a child of mixed race background and have not learned that it’s creepy to treat mixed race people as some sort of experiment and insulting to imply that “looking Asian” (not even sure what this means) is a bad thing?

White people writing about racism

The denial is strong in this one, eh?

Fuck politics of respectability. Fuck that shit hard.

If you cannot tell the difference between a term of endearment and a racial slur, you can’t be helped.

Kind of sad when Skip Bayless does a better job discussing racism than Stephen A Smith. Not cute to see fellow black people play politics of respectability. It is NOT even the slightest bit Riley Cooper’s teammates fault that Riley felt comfortable using a racial slur. It’s sad that Skip can see this, but Stephen A can’t.

I’m over the “out of touch” euphemism for politicians who do shitty things. No, they are not “out of touch.” They know exactly who they are trying to harm. They are very “in touch” with all of that. They are straight up assholes and bullies. Let’s not sidestep the truth.

What I hear when people say, “Don’t make it about race!”

It’s really about race, I just don’t want to have to feel bad for being a racist.

I was talking to a friend about racism and she brought up high profile trials, particularly the Casey Anthony trial. She asked me why a white woman murdering her child became such big news and I said it’s because of the narrative surrounding motherhood. WOC are seen as unfit mothers and a danger to their own children, so a black mother killing her child isn’t seen as if it’s completely unexpected like a white woman killing hers. Not to mention Casey is conventionally attractive, which adds another layer. But what I wanted to ask her is why are you asking me? Why don’t you ask your fellow white people, the Nancy Graces of the world and her ilk and following, why they case became so well-known? People of color didn’t make this into a big deal, white people did. So don’t lash out at us when a white woman’s name is dragged through the mud in the court of public opinion by other white people.

Almost 20 years later, and white people are still talking about OJ. Meanwhile, radio silence from them on the Trayvon Martin case or sometimes even anger that people are upset about a disgusting injustice.

So I feel like this needs to be said about the Twisted fandom, and by that I am mostly referring to those who post on the show’s Facebook page. The ship wars have gotten out of hand.

And not because I’m a Dacey shipper. I don’t mind that there are Janny shippers (though I was surprised to see so many of them given that Danny has shown next to zero interest in Jo romantically and has already tried to kiss Lacey twice despite rarely talking to her), but it is pissing me off that Janny shippers keep calling Lacey a “bitch” or saying she “doesn’t deserve” Danny.

First off, how the hell is Lacey a bitch? Wow, she doesn’t want to be friends with someone who murdered his aunt (and also won’t say why he did it), potentially murdered her best friend and could be a sociopath. In the real world, we would call that common sense. However, in thirsty ass tween fandom world, apparently that’s being a bitch.

Furthermore, how is Jo managing to become some outcast hero to the fandom, escaping the “bitch” tag? She contends she doesn’t like being friends with girls (which is a red flag for insecure women who desperately crave male attention) because she seems to not trust them, but yet immediately after bonding with Lacey, what does she do? Violate Lacey’s boundaries and privacy by stealing the DVD. The problem is her, not girls. She doesn’t give a shit about betraying other girls. That’s why she has problems with them. What she did was hella bitchy and wrong, but I don’t see the outcry on Facebook over that. No, it’s just that Lacey’s a bitch for not wanting to bend over backwards to help out a potential multiple murderer. Um, okay.

And this whole thing about Lacey not “deserving” Danny because she’s not helping him clear his name is just ridiculous. Why should she help him? She doesn’t know if he killed her best friend or not, so he is certainly not entitled to any help from Lacey. I feel like we should be questioning why Jo is so quick to offer her trust to a convicted murderer. And I’m pretty certain if the roles were reversed and Kylie Bunbury played Jo while Maddie Hasson played Lacey, the fandom would be all over Jo for being a naive idiot and praising Lacey for being smart and exercising common sense. Hm, I wonder why? At this point, it comes as no shock to me that the black woman in a TV show is vehemently hated by a large part of the fandom.

Plus, being there for Danny doesn’t entitle Jo to a romantic relationship with him. You know what she is entitled to? The same level of friendship she is giving to Danny. Do people not realize the argument they are making? I’ve had many straight guy friends help me out with things, but that doesn’t mean they are entitled to my vagina in return.

There’s some serious racial misogyny problems in this fandom that make it hard for me to enjoy. I want to be excited that there are POCs and women in lead roles and share that excitement with other people, but the fandom for this show is extremely upsetting. I guess for now I will just have to stay on Tumblr and away from all that bullshit.